Boring Run Talk with More Goose!

Whew, I almost died. Seventy four degrees does feel like the surface of the sun when there's no shade and just black asphalt ahead. I powered through--a whopping 30 minutes of shoe-shuffling goodness.

Today is the first day of the rest of my life. I have committed to living in the present, just like dogs do (thanks Cesar Milan!). Here are my resolutions:

1. Run more.
2. Schedule runs with my peeps.
3. Remember that stressful times are when I need to run, not cancel a run.
4. Track my runs (mileage, time and shoes).
5. Be nicer to my husband (hard to believe, but I've been a real horse's ass to Michael).

Now onto more pleasant topics. My dog, Goose, must have eaten a corn cob three weeks ago. It rolled around in her stomach for awhile and then last Friday finally lodged in her intestine. Two x-rays, one ultrasound, three phone calls, one stomach/intestinal surgery and two million dollars later, Goose is good as new. Thanks to me, her nursemaid. She got three different medications with different dosages at different times of day. I had to carry her up and down the stairs. And at first, had to feed her every three to four hours. Not such Good Times(tm).

(an oldie but a goodie...caught mid-sneeze)

And finally, Penn State is looking really good. That game was epic and I enjoyed every last minute of it. Now, the Eagles are a different story, but I'm still not worried. If we had had Brian Westbrook last night we would have killed those stupid Bears. And Kyle Orton? Are you kidding me?

My baby is walking and wears a 5.5 double wide shoe.

Nut up!

So last night, Michael, Jeffy and I were watching NFL highlights. Michael and I have resumed our losing ways at Fantasy Football (even though, we had 141 points on our effing bench yesterday) and wanted to catch up on the day's events.

So at the end of the Denver San Diego game, Denver was down by one point after scoring a touchdown. So, what do they do...kick the extra point and send it into overtime? Or go for two and win the game. Well, they went for two and won the game (bad call notwithstanding)...anyhoo, we're talking about this and Michael says "Sometimes you have to nut up and go for it."

And the Nut Up Conversation ensued. First, I asked both of them if men really use that phrase. And they told me yes, men use that phrase. So I decided I was going to try and use it in every day conversations. Especially with my clients. Here's how I see it working out:

Client: Hey Sarah, can you turn around a crappy outline for us in three hours?

Me: Well, I guess if I nut up, I can do that. Sure thing!

Sound good? I can't wait to move that phrase into every conversation possible.

Today I actually did nut up and went for a run with the wonderful Amber. We did a little Forest Park loop of about 35 minutes. I had to walk some because I couldn't nut up on the hills, but all in all, it felt great to take the new shoes for a spin.

In other news, I missed my first deadline of all time..meaning, I totally forgot about a project and just didn't do it. I don't think that's every happened to me. I mean, I've tried to get out of deadlines and have gotten them moved, but totally spacing a project. Geez, I need to nut up and run some more to keep my head clear.

And one last thing....da da da da..........

GO E A G L E S !!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Bitch is Back!

Hellllllllllllllllllloooooooooo! Holy cow, it's just been way too long right?

So, today was the second "real" run since going to PA for a month.

I DID NOT RUN ONE TIME while in Pennsylvania.

You all know me. You know what happens when crazy people like me don't get the standard amount of endorphins per day. That's right. I almost killed my nearing-70 year old parents and set their house on fire.

Anyhoo, today I slogged along and felt pretty good about just getting out there and knocking it out. On the last stretch, my fucking IT band (which has not been exercised in over a month and a half) decided to act out...on flat surfaces nonetheless. I hate that bitch. I really do.

So after the run I felt great, took a shower, had lunch with my peeps at a Middle Eastern restaraunt over here on the west side (Poll question: gauche to eat Middle Eastern food on 9/11? Talk amongst yourselves. Poll question #2: gauche to ask if it is gauche to eat Middle Eastern food on 9/11? If so, shut the hell up.) and then hit up the Portland Running Company. I wanted to see if my gait changed since having the second baby. Maybe that's why I've had runners' knee and IT band issues etc.

Where I found out that a) my gait has not changed. I am still running perfection with my neutral gait...did you know that only 10% of runners have a neutral stride? That's right. Jealous much? I thought so. I digress. b) My old shoes were toast and contributing to the leg problems.

So I bought these bad asses:


The Gel Nimbus 10 for $120! Good lord these suckers better post some good numbers for that kind of money. The sweetest, nicest lady on the planet helped me get my shoes. She has two girls 18 months apart and was kind enough to let me know that in two years, things will be a lot better. I can't say "She should suck it" because she was so nice and made me feel like I wasn't crazy for having nervous breakdown days even though I do employ a nanny.

So go to PRC and buy shoes.

And here are the top ten (abbreviated) stories from my PA/NJ shore trip:

1. Bringing the world's worst stomach virus from Portland to Lebanon, PA via an airplane. Got sick the day before (thanks to the Children's Museum!), had to have oxygen on the plane. Didn't eat for four days. Lost five pounds. Gave the virus to both my parents. My mother cried. We all almost died. Moral: quarantine children a week before heading on a plane.
2. Visiting the Lebanon Farm Show every morning for a week. Owen's favorite question: "Going to see cows and pigs?" Saw some enormous cows, pigs, coats, bunnies and sheep.
3. Eating shoo-fly pie. Do a web search. It's some good stuff.
   
4. Going to Hersheypark and killing a 10-year old at Whack a Mole. Owen and my dad appreciated the victory dance.
5. The joy that is Blue's Clues. The songs are still stuck in my head right now.
6. Hearing the word "yous" used in serious conversations. ALL THE TIME. I'm not kidding. For example: what are yous doing tonight? Are yous getting pizza?
   
7. Michael's face when we took him to the Wildwood Boardwalk. Shellshocked didn't begin to describe it. Until you've experienced the white trash goodness that is Wildwood, you haven't lived.
8. Bargaining with a Ukranian young lady in the Wildwood t-shirt shop over a Philadelphia Eagle's t-shirt that reads "BLEED GREEN." I got it for 12 bucks.
   
9. The pizza on the east coast. Fantastic. Papa Murphy's?? Whatever.
   
10. Ripping off the side mirror of my rental car thanks to the banister on the shore house deck. 200 dollars later? Good as new!

Whew. That's it for right now. More as I begin my looooong trek back to becoming a runner.

P.S. Would it be possible to have a better football weekend than last week? Penn State kills the Beavers on national TV, Eagles roll in a blow out (and we have McNabb in fantasy), plus something else that I won't mention because I guess it's not nice to say you're happy about an injury to another human being but you all know what I'm talking about. Good times.

Whew. That Was Close.

So, I've been running, had a three day hiatus there during the fourth of July week. Nothing funny/interesting has happened.

Although no need to fear if you wondered what has happened to my real personality.

It only took one visit to the zoo on a late Sunday afternoon to reaffirm my hatred of people. Larger people walking three wide asking each other who has the chapstick while the world's biggest bottleneck formed behind them was enough to do it. Good times(tm). Michael refused to run them over with the stroller.

That's it from here. T-minus ten days until the Plane Ride From Hell and descent into the Amish Kingdom. Can't wait!

P.S. the Elf is with child.

It's Nice to Be Nice

So, a weird thing happened today on my run. I actually made an effort to talk to another runner.

What have I become? Seriously?!! I hate people. They're the worst.

But let's back up to last night where this nicey niceness all started. My neighbor mommy friend invited me to a book club. Now, this woman is probably the nicest woman you've met, and if she hadn't made a huge effort to befriend me, I'd still be pining away for the East side and the Winco on 82nd and the wonderful mall shopping at the Crack in Your Ass Town Centre, but I digress.

So I'm at the book club meeting (I brought my own list of books I wanted to read. That's how I roll.) and I get to meet the old owner of my house. Now first of all, that's weird but cool at the same time. But get this! She's totally my type of people--meaning: smart, funny, bookish, SHE RUNS, and she even said....[wait for it] "that sucks ass." I had to hold myself back from giving her a bone-crushing hug.

Case closed. I will stalk her and make her be my running partner and new best friend. I've been so starved for real personality over here (not that the neighbor lady doesn't have a personality, but there's no eff bombs coming from that side of the street, if you catch my drift) . So there's my first new friend. And a postscript: she emailed me today to see if I wanted to run this afternoon. Alas, I had already run. I had that feeling like when you're in college and you're totally drunk and you give your number to a cute guy and he calls and you see him again and he's still cute and actually nice. Actually, that's never happened to me, but if I had to imagine, that's what it would feel like.

Rack it.

So then, today, I went for a hood run and down at the OES track was a woman running with a stroller. I cruise up behind her, say hello and then proceed to run and talk with the woman for a mile! Isn't that the most bizarre thing ever? I talked to someone and ran with them and then I got her email information for future runs. She's an urban planner even. I've never met one of those!

So there you have it. The nasty old nag is trying to make friends. Is it because I'm getting older? Is it because I've got the kids? Who knows, but it might not be so bad. Total disclaimer: this doesn't mean I still don't hate people, especially stupid little bitches that run in an all pink outfit with a pink iPod and a pink VISOR. Like, a GOLF VISOR. Ew.

Until tomorrow when Shaunmarie and I attempt my first long run in many moons. Six to eight up on Germantown. Also, dying to see Kara Goucher pull out the 10,000m win tonight. Good times(TM).

I Think I Have Shit

That is perhaps the best Run Report title of all time, and I've had some good ones. By this I mean, I think I have mentally moved past the "injuries." I decided that I'm just going to run every day unless I feel like I really need to take a day off, or work prohibits me from running. The legs aren't 100% but I think taking too many days off is hurting rather than helping. So I'm going to run, baby, run!

So:

• Ran 4.5 miles today in the hood. After several hours of overcast, gorgeous, perfect running weather, the sun came out just as I got going. Remember my one Run Report titled: "It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes?" Right. Legs felt good. Nothing funny happened.
• Yesterday (Wednesday)...rest day. Was planning to run. The day got away from me.
• Tuesday: ran with Shaunmarie on an actual trail at Tryon Creek Park. Elf and I usually ran on the asphalt path, not an actual dirt trail. The hills were huge and we walked a lot. Better than nothing, that's what I say.
• Monday: ran on the trail at Forest Park. Felt fucking fantastic. Burned up the first portion of the run and felt strong throughout.

Plan on running tomorrow and will try for a LONG RUN on Saturday. For sure. That means six or seven miles. Nothing crazy, but it will be epic.

So, not sure you all know this, but the baby had undescended testicles, and I love posting pictures of the scars of testicle surgery. The men seem to really love it. They attach those suckers with buttons. I shit you not:

Behold....NSFW...

OUCH!

"I Feel Like Bacon"

I told Shaunmarie and Jeffy last Sunday that it was time for me to shit or get off the pot with this whole "injury" thing. So either I make an effort through PT, self-massage, cross training, etc. or I just run through the pain and shut the hell up. I mean, I'm used to beating myself up but this is enough already.

The aforementioned running duo and I did a little Esplanade route on Sunday morning with an little Broadway Bridge tacked on. Legs? Ok, but felt like I was running in deep sand.

Monday I ran in the hood for about 44 minutes, and felt so good about my legs and no hurting that I almost uttered the words "I'm cured!" But even though I didn't say them, I thought them and that's fucking good enough for the Gods (we're watching Rome. Whew, there was a lot of violence and sex back then. A lot of knives right through the ol' throat. That's my kind of living!).

Tuesday I took off. Wednesday I ran in Forest Park and had the nagging hamstring pain that threatened to explode so I only ran about 30 minutes. I was proud of myself to listen to the pain.
Thursday I took off, even though I didn't want to.

Today, Friday, I went running at 1:00pm. I must think I'm some sort of badass to run a non-shaded route on asphalt in the middle of the day. I was baking. I'd forgotten how heat just drains a person of energy. I blame it on the documentary I watched two weeks ago--Running on the Sun...all about the Badwater 135 mile run through Death Valley that ascends a mere 8000 feet. Those people are nutty. Seriously, running in 116 degrees without sleep for 28 hours? Holy crap. I guess I figured I could tackle good ol PDX in 75 degrees in June. PDX 1, Me 0.

So halfway through as I'm running around the BLACK track (don't you love the smell and feel of a track that's been baking in the sun? I could lay down and just take a big ol' whiff of that smell, I love it so bad). I said to myself: "I feel like bacon."

Then I had to do a whole deconstruction of it...how I was like bacon (getting fried...usually has a lot of fat around the edges that some people like and some people burn off) and how I wasn't like bacon (it's a great tasting food and I'm pretty bitter when bitten into), you know the usual heat addled stuff.

So I cut the run short and headed home. Took the baby to the doctor--bronchitis. Sweet!